Only trouble is interesting; and character is everything.

Found the title quote while researching over break and I think it really relates to my feedback from December Review

What I heard:

- Seeing the bones through the glasses for the first time, we need to experience Kay's confusion, excitement and wonder (longer moment?)

- I am treating Kay as a supplementary device, I need to make her a character

- Lots of set-up for a such little anatomy.

- Need to convincingly feel emotion with Kay

- Most scenes are static and take place in the middle ground

- More magic

- We look through Kay's eyes early to set us up for the x-ray views

- The cast coming off is anti-climactic

- The main trouble for Kay is her loneliness, the arm break is merely what causes the trouble

What I am going to do about it:

- I am going to take more time in the beginning to show Kay's need for friends (instead of us just seeing kay hanging from the tree, we also see a bunch of other kids around her.)

- Kay's moments of exploration will be longer and more in depth instead of just a quick glance at a cat or fish. We will see the animals and people from different angles and distances to express Kay's curiosity and to make the images more dynamic. This also solves the problem with little anatomy and lots of build-up.

- Kay's moment of rejection and frustration with being unable to play with her friends is more dramatic.

- Play around with medium to see if I can make things stand out without color and to differentiate between the x-ray world and regular world. 

- Kay will check her arm with the glasses every few pages to show healing and time passage, not a montage.